The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I crot should offer to porn perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for bokep caterwauling) to the receptionist porn the next morning, bokeh she rolled her eyes and memek declared the woman an ‘actrice’, porn or bokeh sex worker.

Now, bokep according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, bokep it all makes crot scientific sense. It confirms what most bokep women know and memek all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokep the greater the chance the orgasm is bokeh being faked. In other words, porn you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: porn there’s sex as bokeh performance art, bokep and bokep sex as genuine intimacy. And bokep when a woman is bokep genuinely aroused, porn trusts her partner and porn is not fearing for crot a fragile male ego, bokeh she’s far crot more likely to gently porn sigh and memek moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen bokep in my Parisian hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, bokep female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional memek basis, porn they’d memek explain, bokeh so they could make their partner feel happy, crot while conserving their energy for porn other tasks crot in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and porn ‘manipulation’, bokeh and memek that women were prone to what they porn described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, bokeh so bokeh to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokep the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: crot ‘I’m enjoying this, memek but can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, bokep ladies?

The only other reason to porn screech crot like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, memek where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland porn said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: porn ‘As far as I’m concerned, memek that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, bokeh only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

In their book, bokeh Sex At Dawn, bokep Christopher Ryan and bokep Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy porn during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and memek keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, crot I can understand bokep the memek need to advertise. But bokep if you’re not, bokep bokeh then men should take heed: bokeh the bokeh best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris